I spoke to xiu last nite abt the thing between him and me. We realised that there are many things in common between our relationship.

Now, i question myself abt since this has happen 4 yrs plus ago and i have been through this shit. And it is happening now again, not on my side but it happens to him. What makes me think that it will not happen again 4 yrs later. It really make me wonder now.

Once someone says that he don't know whether he still loves you, isn't it a sign that he is in doubt of his love for you? Why there shd be a doubt? In love, i think there shdn't be any doubt abt your love. Why is it so unclear?

Well, it hurts alot when i first got to know abt this. Reason being you know that the person that you love so deeply already has doubts on his love to me. Intially, i'll think of our pass meet-up on whether during that meet-up he still loves me or he is unsure. But now, i don't have to think so. Cos it's the past, why do i have to think so much? There's nothing you can do abt it now.

Now, i wonder is it time to let go? A part of me wanted so badly and a part of me is unsure and afraid of the outcome. No matter what we have been together for so long and been through alot of things. Plus the fact that everyone including my relatives know abt our relationship. How am i suppose to face them? I did that 4 yrs ago. Why make me face this kind of situation again? Through this is the last thing on my mind.

What about my parents? They couldn't sleep cos we break up the last time. And my dad even come in to my room to console me cos my mum was scare.. haha..

Do i still have to waste my time with him and let him make a decision that he may be making of the worse?

Is it silly for me to wait for him?